A query on the AskGayBrosOver30 subreddit has prompted a debate about douching.
“This query is for older gays,” mentioned a person in his late 30s. He wished to understand how males ready for f**cking.
“Have been douching/enemas a factor? How involved have been guys about cleanliness/what sorts of issues did they do to scrub up?”
How about we take this to the subsequent stage?
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The query prompted nearly 300 replies. The overall consensus was sure, douching now appears to be talked about and practiced approach greater than previously. Typically to the purpose of obsession.
For a begin, in earlier a long time, it was much more frequent for males to make use of condoms.
“Again within the 90s, we have been extra petrified of HIV than poop on a condom,” was probably the most well-liked reply.
A person in his early 60s mentioned he remembered a time earlier than HIV. He mentioned it’s not all all the way down to condoms.
“Earlier than HIV was a problem, douching was additionally not common (or something near it). The usage of condoms didn’t actually change something, although I agree that their discontinuation did imply that youthful guys who’d by no means f**ked uncooked thought poop was a giant deal.”
Weight-reduction plan
Others counsel our diets have modified over the a long time.
“20-30 years in the past, our diets have been extra prone to comprise larger quantities of fiber and fewer ultra-processed meals. Now we now have fast-food bottoms ravenous themselves for 2 days earlier than hooking up,” one mentioned.
One other agreed, saying, “I’d like to notice that it isn’t simply individuals consuming unhealthy diets. There are additionally many components in frequent meals which are inflicting issues for many individuals.”
Some mentioned they thought the discourse on douching inside homosexual tradition had reached a over-hyped stage. Social media undoubtedly additionally performs a component on this.
water ran so clear you could possibly slap a purified label on it
— Ty (@_teekaloo_) June 1, 2025
i’m not douching for over 30 minutes, child simply come get this portray.
— joshua. (@livingthroughJ) June 2, 2025
Tops should suppose bottoms simply stroll round douched. 😑
— Simply AJ (@AJ_DaVers) April 3, 2024
“Individuals didn’t douche with the obsession they do as we speak. It was frequent to have intercourse with out douching first,” mentioned a person in his early 50s.
A person in his early 30s mentioned he couldn’t perceive why many males have been so preoccupied with douching. Certainly, once you’re in a long-term relationship, it actually can take the spontaneity out of hopping into mattress collectively.
“I don’t get the development now,” he mentioned. “I used to be in a five-year relationship, neither of us ever douched, and in these 5 years, there have been TWO occasions we would have liked to hop within the bathe.”
We guess guys usually tend to douche if hooking up with a stranger or on a primary date. In spite of everything, first impressions rely and no-one desires to threat messing issues up—pun supposed—from the get-go.
Grownup leisure
Different individuals mentioned there was one other issue that had prompted the rise in douching: The simple availability of grownup leisure. Nobody ever seems to have an accident and is at all times spotlessly clear.
“Even 20 years in the past there wasn’t this absolute neuroticism about rinsing out your colon,” mentioned one man.
Others mentioned they felt extra assured in the event that they knew they have been clear and fortunately douched, whereas some mentioned they’d gone years with out douching and had no icky incidents.
“This obsession with cleanliness within the bed room isn’t wholesome”
Queerty determined to ask a few specialists.
Alex Corridor is an influencer with a big social media following for his ‘Bottom’s Digest’, fiber-heavy meal recipes.
“Douching, particularly over-douching, is unquestionably extra of a priority as we speak than it ever was earlier than,” he instructed us by way of e mail.
Corridor additionally feels that grownup leisure has performed a giant half on this.
“With the rise of the web within the early 2000s making p*rn simpler to entry than ever earlier than, our notion of what homosexual intercourse is ‘supposed’ to appear to be modified. ‘Excellent’ our bodies; ‘Excellent’ settings; ‘Excellent’ experiences. There aren’t any messy accidents.”
He reminds those that grownup leisure is a “highly-produced fantasy, not actuality.”
The fact is that accidents do happen, however “not practically as a lot as you may obsess over,” says Corridor. “A high-fiber weight loss plan and data of your distinctive bowel regularity are the actual instruments that may put together you for a very good time within the bed room. This obsession with cleanliness within the bed room isn’t wholesome and sometimes results in over-douching which has long-term well being results like douching dependency. Some research present that over-douching may even result in simpler STI transmission.
“Relating to douching, much less is finest each single time.”
“We do see people who take it approach too far”
Dr Carlton Thomas is a homosexual gastroenterologist with an enormous social media following. He’s additionally the co-host of the Butt Honestly with Doctor Carlton & Dangilo podcast.
He says there are much more sources (each on-line data and merchandise) accessible which have helped gas the rise in douching.
Does he consider this a wholesome behavior or can it cross a line?
“I feel the vast majority of individuals simply need to really feel good and have their companions really feel good throughout intercourse. Personally, once I backside it’s simply extra comfy to have an ‘empty chamber’ to play in,” he says.
“Nevertheless we do see people who take it approach too far and starve themselves over bottoming. They worry consuming as a result of it might add to stool manufacturing earlier than intercourse. Some individuals spend hours getting cleaned out after they actually solely ought to be taking lower than half-hour or so.”
Dr Cartlon says his personal “knowledgeable suggestions as a homosexual GI physician who additionally bottoms” embrace fiber dietary supplements and avoiding meals that immediate private bowel troubles.
He additionally says it’s finest to “keep away from consuming inside an hour of play resulting from our physique’s pure gastrocolic reflex that causes bowel stimulation to make room for the meals coming in by making your waste exit.”
Like Corridor, Physician Carlton stresses that one can take douching too far.
“Don’t overdo it with how a lot water you place up there. An excessive amount of could make it an extended and messier course of.”
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